Am I a para-legal yet?

While some of you know my story, I’m betting most of you don’t. Through a series of bad decisions in the past, and walking away from God to choose a life of fun, alcohol, and carelessness, I now have children from different fathers. (Don’t judge me- that’s God’s job!) My life is back on track, but now it’s time to clean up after my past choices.

To make a really long, complicated history short; I am now in the middle of a world of hurt. We’re gearing up for our move to Iowa, but first I have to take care of technicalities with custody & parenting plans. My oldest daughter’s father has vanished. No issues there. My second daughter revealed a few months ago that some highly inappropriate things had happened, and now we’re in the process of that whole mess.

My third daughter’s father decided after four years that we were through, and married someone about 5 months after we split, and then filed for custody (with a lawyer his mother paid for, mind you) of our daughter. Despite the fact that he had a criminal history, abandoned his daughter for nearly 4 months, and multitudes of other low-down things, he got custody of her. When we move, she will be staying in Washington state with her dad. Just thinking about it breaks my heart, but I have to believe that God has a better purpose for her staying with him. And that’s all I’m going to say about that, because I don’t want to bawl my eyes out for the rest of the night.

Now onto my fourth. I’m in the middle of a legal soup. I have people telling me how to handle this fourteen ways from Sunday, and yet nothing seems to be right. I’ve been told to file relocation paperwork. I’ve been told that I don’t have to because there is no order giving him visitation. He also assaulted me recently, and there is a restraining order in place now– so what do I do?! Can I take her? A commissioner said I have to file relo papers first. A lawyer said I didn’t. Sheesh!

Keep in mind that I can’t afford an attorney with a $6,000 retainer fee, so I’m handling all the paperwork myself. Why do the courts make it SO HARD to do the right thing? Having to pay almost $300 today to file some paperwork–something I am legally obligated to do– is complete idiocy. My theory is, the counties & state courts all get kick-backs from the attorneys making $6,000 a case, so they continue to murk up the justice system to bankroll on unsuspecting citizens. Just sayin’.

Something else that makes NO SENSE is this:

Why is it that, if I went to my ex’s house, and shot him between the eyes, I would get a court appointed attorney, and yet, by trying to do the right thing, and follow the law that’s been laid, I have to fork over more money than my last two cars cost, COMBINED? What kind of jacked-up crap is that?! Why do our tax dollars pay for serial killers, child molesters, and thieves to have representation, but upholding citizens get screwed? Can anyone answer that question?

I won’t even get started on all the free perks that come with jail time!

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2 Responses to Am I a para-legal yet?

  1. simplyaltered says:

    {sigh} this is wearing me out, just to think of ALL these details in the midst of moving. I hope all goes well for your second daughter. That is heartbreaking!!! I can not imagine. So sorry for these issues that have come up for you. It just plain stinks, but your faith will get you through it. Keep God close at hand, I am sure you will need his guidence. Saying an extra prayer for everyone affected indeed.

  2. thevfamily says:

    I had never thought about the point of a court appointed attorney for people who murder yet nothing of the like for citizens just seeking to deal with other legal issues. Hmmm.

    Maybe there is a lawyer that you can get a hold of through your church or something that can help you out, perhaps for free, or at least discounted?

    Good luck trying to sort it all out. Does sound terribly exhausting on the body and the emotions.

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